Naked Gamer

An Experiment Too Brief

2010-04-03T18:34:00.003+11:00

This will be my last update at Naked Gamer. It will be a tad underwhelming, but then so was this blog. In short I have decided not to update here any longer, I was planning to delete all my old posts but being the terrible hoarder I am I could not, so I am abandoning them to the internet. Please feel free to browse them, spam them, comment on them, and anything else you choose, but do not expect any thing further from me. I have decided I don't really have anything unique to say about video games, and so I will leave it to those that do.

Farewell to all you lovers, haters and indifferents. I had fun, and that's enough for me.

Goo Review

2009-07-20T08:12:00.006+10:00

It's been almost a year since World of Goo was released for computer and Nintendo Wii, so I think it is just about time for me to review it. Getting closer, closer. Almost there...

Okay now it's time.

I have finally finished World of Goo, and by finished I do mean played to a point beyond which I can go no further ... because I am terrible at video games. All video games, without exception no matter how much I adore them. Just don't have a knack for it. But I do adore World of Goo. In fact, aside from my inability to get passed the level I have stalled pathetically at (which is a me thing not a bad game design thing), I can find no fault with it.

To alleviate my dismay at not being able to continue the divine ecstasy that is creating towers of little goos and watching them tumble adorably to the ground below, I am going to tell you all about the game. I am going to reminisce about the happy times when I could still pass each level. Specifically about the computer version because I have not played the Wii one, though critics tell me it's very good.

So on to World of Goo: a physics based engineering extravaganza. Or more specifically a puzzle game. You play some form of omnipotent being who gains perverse pleasure by encouraging little goo balls to form bridges, towers and ladders. It's never explained how you do this, but the goos seem to greatly enjoy it so it can be safely concluded that you aren't encouraging them with a portable taser... or they love being shocked.

Why do you do this? That one is easy. The goos need to get from point a: the ground, to point b: safely through a pipe. That’s where you come in. You have to work out how to get as many goo balls as possible through the pipe so they can happily bounce around in the goo equivalent of Heaven.

It starts off easy, but it gets very hard, very fast. You get help in the form of the Signwriter, but he's cryptic. There's always a way, but as stated at the start I for one have difficulty finding it. But ultimately the game is extremely fun. It’s challenging but entertaining, cryptic but funny, and graphically it’s gorgeous.

And that's why World of Goo is worth the price tag, because it's fun and endearing. You will spend hours sitting around trying to get past the various levels, and the game will look damn gorgeous whilst you’re doing it. So go and get your Goo on. Buy a copy here.

Screw a Rub a Dub

2009-05-29T22:05:00.007+10:00

Well after almost a year of neglect I decided to play Super Rub A Dub with some friends tonight. Sure it's music is torturous, but at least it makes a fun drinking game. But you know what? Sony has screwed me. One mandatory update was all it took for them to reverted the game I paid for to a trial version. Thanks a lot Sony, you just stole the value of the game from me.

That's right, I paid for Super Rub A Dub. Why? Because I actually bother to try new downloadable games available in the stores for all my consoles. And how does Sony repay that? By stealing from me and screwing me over.

I hope you feel fabulous Sony execs.

Note: I did end up getting the game reinstalled, but that didn't eliminate my fury at the update bug stopping me playing with my mates so this post is not being archived and taken down. Sorry Sony.

Gettin' a Buzz On

2009-05-22T09:06:00.017+10:00

The internet tells me there is a dearth of decent reviews of Buzz: Brain of Oz. Though on reflection this is hardly surprising, Sony seems to take perverse pleasure in screwing their Australian customers so most people probably haven't had a chance to play it yet. Even on their official website it is fairly well hidden.

Anyway, now that I have my very own shiny copy of the game I feel obliged to review it for the benefit of the unnamed masses... though no promises it will be decent. That's one thing Buzz: Brain of Oz definitely isn't... morally speaking not quality wise of course.

It's a fun game, I can't deny that. But I don't think I would let my young offspring play it. Though, since I am fortunate enough not to have any of my own I guess I can't say that with any certainty.

On first impression Buzz looks sweet and innocent. The colourful, cartoonish graphics and corny banter at the start of the game easily lull the player into a false sense of security. But Buzz, the puppet who hosts the game, has a wide variety of slightly smutty remarks to mutter throughout. It's quite hilarious, but definitely comes as a shock.

Not that there isn't a grand history of filthy mouthed puppets in the world.

So dialogue wise Buzz is fun. Corny, but fun.

Content wise Buzz: Brain of Oz also delivers. It is pretty much what you would expected from a quiz game; a range of topics, a variety of segments (point stealer and fastest finger are definitely my faves), with a fairly arbitrary means of determining a winner in the end. You can also make your own quizzes online, which is fun but so far my playstation3 has had serious issues uploading my questions.

At $109.95(aud) the game is definitely pushing the very top of the price bracket, but I managed to find it for less and at the lower price I would recommend the game as a definite purchase. The awesome plastic buzzers alone make it worth while. Plus it's a great party game. It is significantly more fun with four players then with two.

So if you are looking for a fun, casual game you can just pick up and play with friends you should grab a copy of Buzz. It's more fun then it the box makes it look.

Super Rub a Drink

2009-05-13T19:38:00.010+10:00

Released in early 2007 as a download game for the PlayStation 3, Super Rub a Dub is widely agreed to be one of the worst games available on the console. Personally, I think this is unfair. It's clumsy controls, brilliant colours, and torturous duckling squeaks all combine to make the game fairly challenging and, at times, one that is almost fun. Though as unfairly criticised as I feel this game is, I don't think it is good enough to justify a re-review on Naked Gamer.

But, I do feel it is important to draw attention to the games one, clear, redeeming feature: Super Rub a Dub makes the perfect drinking game. How do you play? Just drink each time a duckling gets it.

Fat Princess

2009-04-29T12:54:00.006+10:00

I have been anticipating this game for several months now, in fact it has probably been over a year. Part of this excitment may be due to the fact that, as a download game for the Playstation3, I won't have to wait months and months after the rest of the world to get a version of my very own... which is decidely awesome. Though I still don't entirely trust Sony not to screw up the supposed Spring 2009(northern hemisphere)launch date.

Anyway, since I haven't played the game I can't give you much info on it. But you should all be excited, so I am going to point you towards an excellent preview of the game's private beta test. You should watch it because it's funny and rambling and probably has other good qualities. Go here

Note: How awesome is that logo?

Go Here...

2009-04-26T16:19:00.001+10:00

High Priest

eBook With a Difference

2009-04-22T11:10:00.007+10:00

A friend sent me a link to this th'smorning, and I found it quite fascinating. I had never considered the need for such a thing as a brail eBook before, which undoubtedly is due to the fact I have never had a need one. But now that I have been pointed in the direction of such a device I find it absolutely brilliant and fascinating.

The idea of eBooks and eBook readers is something of a passion of mine. I love to read on the digital medium, and, although many of my friends fall into the anti-ebook category, I still find it hard to fathom why the technology is not more widely embraced. Sure, at the moment it's hard to beat the beautiful texture and smell of a paper book. But I assure you, a night spent lying under the country stars, reading a favourite book on an iPod touch or some other ereader, without the need to hold a torch in one hand to illuminate a page, will quickly change even the most stubborn anti-ebook fanatics mind.

But regardless of my love of the eBook, I think it is hard to deny the brilliance of this brail version. It is just fantastic, an excellent application of the technology, and I really hope a lot of people benefit from it.

Editor's Note: Okay, so maybe it's time to confess this is at best a prototype and at worst a hoax. But it is a brilliant concept design none-the-less.

Evernoteworthy

2009-04-05T15:45:00.010+10:00

After hearing regular, raving reviews of Evernote for weeks, I decided to check out this software back in late February. Now that I have had a chance to really get to know it, and become scarily dependent on it, I think it is high time Evernote got a review.

Evernote is essentially a very comprehensive tool for managing information. Yes, I know, the internet is full of such software. As a species we seem to be obsessed with information management. A sentiment I would love to say was my own, but I think the writers of Deep Space Nine definitely beat me to it, in this episode. Regardless, Evernote is definitely a very good piece of software. I have found it invaluable since starting to use it, as a means of managing my many, many different research projects, and also just to keep track of things that interest me.

By far it's most bad arse feature is handwriting recognition. With the help of a digital camera, Evernote can store images of hand-written notes as easily as it can duplicate a web page or take a note. With it's extremely sophisticated handwriting recognition the software can also search these hand-written notes. I have included an interface screen shot displaying a hand-written note I wrote as part of my research for a co-authored book chapter on World of Warcraft, that I put in Evernote. Amazingly, Evernote successfully located almost all the terms I searched for in the hand-written note. As you can plainly see, I don't exactly have easy handwriting to read, and most people I know couldn't locate specific terms I had hand-written, even when they were pointed out.

You might think that any software that uses handwriting recognition that sounds like something out of a CIA blackops department, would be a nightmare to use. But the Evernote interface is beautiful and the software is generally easy to use. There are three different interfaces, all pictured, so you can choose one that suits you. It also regularly syncs with your account on the Evernote website, so you can access your Evernotes anywhere you have an internet connection. You can also make multiple Notebooks in Evernote, and set them to either public or private viewing. You can see all my notebooks in the interface screenshots. Which makes it even easier to manage all your clippings and notes.

I also think attention has to be brought to a fantastic piece of complimentary Evernote software, Everboat, by this software designer. This little piece of software is for Mac OS X only, but it makes adding notes to Evernote awesomely easy. All that you have to do is activate Everboat from the dock, and it will let you take running notes by typing into a tiny notepad. Update by hitting carriage return. And you will receive a growled notification that your note has been updated successfully to Evernote.

The software can be downloaded and used for free, but there is a storage cap. You can subscribe monthly to get an almost unlimited amount of storage. It can be downloaded for Mac, WIndows, iPhone and Web.

Evernote is an awesome information management tool. And since both Evernote and Everboat are free, for the most part, none of you have any excuse not to check them out.

Noby Noby Boy

2009-03-30T16:09:00.002+11:00

I had no intention of making the next naked gamer post about this small, downloadable game for the PlayStation3. In fact the idea that Noby Noby Boy might even be worth reviewing had not crossed my mind even once, when I saw the promotional material and subsequent reviews for the game. But after playing with this spontaneous little ball of colour and random love for several hours on the weekend, I decided to spontaneously review it.

First up, Noby Noby Boy is weird. It is supremely weird, and I deeply suspect it’s creator Keita Takahashi, might find it extremely pleasing to hear that. But the game’s weirdness makes it immensely fun.

What do you do in it? Whatever you want really.

If you’re like me you will spend a good fifteen minutes utterly mesmerized by the plethora of strange, clashing, flashing and swirly colours, before realising there is actually a playstation controller in your hand. This revelation will be followed by hours terrorising the inhabitants of each different map, though playground seems more apt, with your enormous, gorging worm-like form.

So far I have greatly enjoyed destroying the pyramids, and eating any evidence that may implicate me in this crime. I have gorged on camels, cats and clouds. And on one, very very memorable occasion, I watched an extremely amused friend terrorise moon-people atop a floating platform inside our divine moon.

It really is a surprising game. As I already said, from the promotional material it doesn’t seem that interesting. And on first encounter Noby Noby Boy does seem to lull the player into some strange trance. But, like Noby Noby Boy’s careless devouring of the oversized baseballs that miraculously rain from the sky onto each Noby Noby Map, this game will eat you whole. It will suck you into it’s strange coloured innards, and you won’t even realise you’ve spent the last ten hours there until it poops you out shaped like an orange cat man, in front of your alarm clock, who’s face is cheerily reminding you that you are two hours late for work.

Sony: New Frontiers

2009-02-26T09:32:00.009+11:00

Sony has a history of going all out with viral, and just plain freaky, marketing campaigns, but now they have something new to catapult them into the headlines: PlayStation Palmar Hidradenitis. Yes, it is their very own disease! Sure, it's a very unexciting disease, if you're interested red welts on the hands potentially caused by holding onto a controller too hard, but it is their disease non-the-less.

I am still not entirely convinced the Playstation3 marketing team didn't just plant a paper in the British Journal of Medicine. But regardless they deserve congratulations. Sony, either congratulations on your own disorder, or congrats on an incredibly ballsy new marketing campaign.

Return of the Ring

2009-02-19T09:06:00.004+11:00

Unbelievable the xbox360 in my house is broken...again!. Yes, once again the console is off to Microsoft with red ring of deathness plaguing it. Clearly when they advised me that they had "fixed" the problem last time, the company was using some crazy definition of the word that meant they did jack all.

And just for the record, I can say that in the year since I last dealt with Microsoft their customer service has improved by exactly zero percent. Congratulations Microsoft, could you be any better at change and improvement?

Note: If my computer knew how to do an interobang it would be inserted at the start of the last sentence... for anyone that couldn't pick that up.

End Game

2009-02-16T16:26:00.004+11:00

Just one last anecdote left from my various encounters with Game last year. Suprising I know, but they are still contacting me months after I last left their store.

Mid last week on of their outlets was in touch to advise the store was still holding a ten dollar deposit for a Little Big Planet preorder that I had actually cancelled, and received a refund for, several months prior. Intrigued I visited the store to collect this supposed refund, only to be told they couldn't issue it because their computers had been shut down for the day. Apparently they couldn't locate my preorder in their sophisticated 'random receipts crammed in a folder under the desk' filing system, without the assistance of their computer.

I wasn't really suprised, nor was I particularily bothered since they had already issued the refund they were attempting to reissue. But I found it an ammusing story none the less.

Classified Content

2009-02-04T21:42:00.008+11:00

There is one issue that crops up over and over again in the video game world; the censorship/game ratings debate. The industry isn't really unique in that regard, I cannot think of a single area of entertainment or art that has not been plagued with similar debates from close to their inception, or at least from their rise to popularity. So encountering this little article in a relatively mainstream paper this afternoon was entirely unsurprising. What I did find fascinating was that it entirely proved the point that game classification is redundant.

Of course the author had no intention of making that argument, but that is exactly what he achieved. In brief his article aimed to highlight the fact that what he termed "online games", such as World of Warcraft and the now cancelled Tabula Rasa, seem to exploit a government loophole that allows them to not place a government classification on their boxes when they are sold in stores.

So in short what he is saying is that for the last five or so years some of the most successful and widely enjoyed video games in the world have been sold to the unwitting public with out ratings displayed on their packaging, and somehow, through some amazing miracle... possibly of science, society has survived this time without coming to any harm. How unexpected.

Or would it be more accurate to state simply that the video game classification system doesn't work. In fact I would go as far as saying no classification system in the entertainment industry really works.

During the time these "online games" have become popular, has a single anti-violence in video game s campaigner pointed a finger at this type of game as the source for various appalling acts of brutality perpetrated by both minors and adults? No one that I can think of has, that is for sure. Yes, there has been deaths, and claims of addiction. That I will conceded. But even the most fanatical antigamer wouldn't deny that these few cases came down to the stupidity of the individual.

So ultimately the community has been coping just fine with these hugely popular games, that have been without classification for years. Nothing seems to have gone wrong so far. Does this suggest that people are entirely capable of decision making independently of government bodies? And that it might be time to abandon this archaic system of ratings? I mean surely most governments have more important issues to deal with then minors playing certain video games. If they start worrying about something as inane as that, what's the next waste of time? Bills of parliament focusing on women sunbathing topless in public?

At the end of the day, the whole point of ratings is to protect minors. But there's already someone doing that - their parents. And if parents don't give enough of a damn about their kids to sit down with them and watch them play a game that they think might be inappropriate, then they have a lot more to worry about then getting a classification sticker put on the cover of each and every game.

Wrath of the Incompetent Store Clerks: The Final Chapter

2009-01-17T12:53:00.010+11:00

Yes, it has been so long since I posted on this topic you probably had all entirely forgotten I said I would follow up on what happened. Well good news! I finally got sick of waiting for Game Head Office to call me back; after many, many, many phone calls and emails. So in the end what happened? I never got my Wrath of the Lich King Collectors Edition, that's what. But Blizzard answered all my questions and were entirely lovely, where as Game ignored all my questions due to what I can only assume is yet another example of their gross incompetence. Needless to say Blizzard's claims that Game were participating in vicious rumour mongering to cover up their Collectors Edition pre-order cock-up must be the case. A visual summary of each companies quotation highlights follows:

They've arrived?

2008-12-09T17:10:00.007+11:00

Well it's officially happened. The Guitar Hero franchise has grown so large and cumbersome it has bulged out of the game-store, and into your local toy-store. I can't decide whether to applaud Red Octane for this mindblowing step into undeniable-mainstreamness, of cry at just how far they have falen from their former glory. I feel settling for a Jefferton Clap is the only possible course open to me in this case.

The incriminating evidence:

Wrath of the Incompetent Store Clerks

2008-11-14T00:48:00.010+11:00

It's been two months since I pre-ordered Wrath of the Lich King, the second expansion for disturbingly popular World of Warcraft. I know it's been two months with absolute certainty, because I am looking at my pre-order receipt. I am looking at it very, very angrily. In fact I think the anger is exacerbated by the fact that this pre-order wasn't for me, it was for a good friend. I have had to let my WOW subscription lapse of late due to financial woes, but I am funding the expansion for this friend. Someone who is a big fan of the game, and certainly has more time to enjoy playing this new expansion than I do.

I even ordered the collectors edition, because the content looked so good. Again, the receipt confirms this.

So today, with the release day less than twelve hours away I rang the store holding my pre-order. It's important to make sure nothing goes wrong, especially considering my dubious experience with game stores and pre-orders in the past. But the very nice clerk on the phone assures me that everything is in order, and he has a record of my pre-order. No mam', we can't confirm the price till midnight tonight. Blizzard isn't giving us the limited edition details till then. But you could come to the midnight launch and pick up your game.

No pricing details till midnight? Weird.

At 11pm on November 13th, T minus one hour till Lich King, Game has already drawn a large crowd. Naturally they have opened their doors early to palm off their miscellaneous, overpriced warcraft memorabilia on hardcore fans. Observations aside, it is at this point my friend and I receive the shocking news. Due to some unimaginable catastrophe all but nine of Game's forty one special edition pre orders can not be filled. The clerk has to check if one of those nine is mine. It has to be though, I confirmed my pre-order only hours before!

Predictably mine is not one of the nine. The clerk is all apologies. Evidently the person I spoke to had been a casual, he hadn't known what he was talking about. All they could offer me was a two month free subscription, and the regular edition of the game.

Of course I am furious, but what can I do? My friend wants the game, naturally we are both disappointed, but at least we can get a copy.

In the hour I waited to get my non-collectors edition copy of the game, I had plenty of time to investigate exactly what had gone wrong with my pre-order, and the other thirty two like it.

Over half an hour even all my attempts at talking to the staff at Game failed miserably. They didn't seem like horrible people, but their customer service was abysmal. They almost all blatantly avoided me or walked away from me halfway through a question, ignoring it outright. Getting no where I headed upstairs to EB Games. Although I am not overly fond of the chain, I have had some very good customer services experiences previously, and they were the only other place open this close to midnight.

One of their clerks gladly answered my questions, and gave me their side of the story. They had experienced a problem with the collectors edition pre orders, just like Game had. EB took all the blame though. They had underestimated the demand for pre-orders and simply over booked the collectors edition without realising it. A month back they discovered their error and notified all pre-orders that they must return to the store and make an additional advance payment in order to ensure their pre-orders. A month ago!!!!

Back at Game I finally corner a clerk, it was as I was paying for my game so I don't really feel he was going out of his way to be helpful. Still, at last I am hearing Game' side of the story. According to them the whole debacle was Blizzards fault. The studio had informed the store mid week that they were reducing the number of copies going to the store in order to ship extras to America. As a result Blizzard was subsidising the two month subscriptions Game was being forced to give out to customers.

Both stories had a ring of truth to them. Though I could easily poke holes in Games' tale. Sure Blizzard subsidising the accounts implies that it was Blizzard, and not Game, that screwed up, and Blizzard wanting to send extra stock to America makes sense too. Australia always gets screwed like that. But with only a few days till launch surely time would make such a thing unfeasible?

So I am angry, very angry, that my excitment was tainted by this screw up. That once again the gaming industry has demonstrated that it cannot deliver on it's promises. And that I couldn't get a straght answer out of the people who's wages I was helping pay.

But a straight answer is still what I am after. And I think the only way to get that is to go to the one place that wil know what's going on; Blizzard. When I am more awake I am going to email them. I doubt they will reply, but if they do I will post it.

Regardless, I got the game for my friend. I have seen bits and pieces of it, but I don't feel I can really enjoy it until my anger subsides. Though so far I must confess that it looks excellent, even, if I I won't be gettingStormy the baby frost wyrm as a pet any more.

Apple II Forever

2008-11-02T12:48:00.010+11:00

Apple II running the playstation 3. Check out the awesomeness*:

* Photos reproduced with permission of Leon f Spencer

FS5 Hockey for iPhone

2008-10-28T23:43:00.018+11:00

Ignore the name, the name is terrible. If you were to judge this game based solely on that title it would never get sold, you could not even give it away. But fortunately the average Joe is smarter than that, which is why this app is currently the fourth most downloaded free application in the iTunes App Store.

But is it any good? Sure the masses might like it, but anyone who's been out in the harsh light of day for more than five minutes should know that the hordes will go for just about anything if they're giving it away free (well ad supported) on street corners. Fortunately FS5 is a damn fine iGame.

In short it is Air Hockey, a simple but flawless game in the real world, that you would expect any half decent developer to easily rise to the challenge of digitising. And developers FlipSide 5 do just that. The puck moves with all the audacity and speed you have come to curse it's physical counterpart for over the years, and the player controls aren't half bad either: as with most iPhone app's you manoeuvre the bat with thumb, forefinger, or just about any finger. Scoring is simple: first to five, seven, nine or eleven points wins, and the game really won't care if your opponent is scoring those goals or your incompetence is scoring them for him. You also have a choice to handicap yourself, or your opponent if they are just kicking arse at iHockey, by decreasing or increaseing the size of the goal.

It's not all good news. Although the game has both one and two player options, the iPhone is a tad squidgy when it comes to sharing the screen between two sets of fingers. The developers have built in wifi capabilities enabling you to play using two iPhones, undoubtedly alleviating the space problem, but entirely failing to maintain the familiar Air Hockey table feel. It doesn't help that you both end up playing with the same colour puck either, making it feel like you are both on the same side. The only other con is the disappearing bats Take your finger off those at all and they don't just go invisible, they leave the table entirely leaving your goal open. It's a little odd, but I am sure it made sense to the developers at the time.

Strange flaws aside, this game is definitely worth the download time. It's fun, well done and the intrusion of a number of very irritating ads are a small price to pay for hours of fun!

Little Big Pussies

2008-10-20T12:25:00.014+11:00

Well, Sony has fucked up again. Honestly, I can't say I'm surprised. Recalling LittleBigPlanet just one week before it’s release date is merely the latest incident in a very long line of ones showing that Sony have balls the size of stale peanuts. Don’t believe me? Just look at their sad little apology for the God of War II Launch party in Greece last year. And they didn’t even decapitate a goat this time! All they did was miss two inappropriate lines in a three minute song from the background music on one level!

We are talking about the company that created the PlayStation 2 here! Maybe not the biggest selling console of all time, but it had to have come damn close. And what is the company now? A bunch of scared wolves howling in a padded room where they know no-one that matters can hear them.

I am told that even if they hadn’t recalled the game, even if they had proceeded with the launch and risked a law suit the outcome would have been the same. That is how the English legal machine works. They still would have been done for distributing offensive material, they would have lost millions of dollars, and there still would have been a recall of LittleBigPlanet. But is a couple of million dollars that much for a goliath like Sony?

Of course in the end there will still be a LittleBigPlanet. And Media Molecule will still have weathered the storm of outrage, with Sony there to shield them. Even though Sony could probably have handled a litigious England, the little studio behind the game may have paid a much heavier price. So I suppose there is a happy ending after all.

And I doubt Sony cares that they pissed off one person by failing to deliver on their promise: an October 23rd release date for LittleBigPlanet.

Of course, this entire rant could result from the ongoing nightmare that the PS3 in my apartment seems to have caused. I can not help but agree with my housemate’s weekend remark that the inability to get the console to mesh with my cruddy old TV is just the latest hurdle in an ongoing cosmic joke against playing the PS3 in our home.

Why oh why will it work on an Apple II, but be too sophisticated for a gorgeous dell widescreen monitor? The joke continues…

And so it would seem I will not be playing LittleBigPlanet when Sony manages to regrow it’s spine and sets a release date for LittleBigPlanet. At least I can let off some steam playing the awesomely awesome Castle Crashers on the consistently working, except for the bit where it wasn’t (but that’s a different story), Xbox 360.